It's 2:47am, and I'm still awake

I am really tired, but I can't sleep... why? Well, because I'm a bubble head who had coffee at 10pm. Every Thursday night is my girls night out and usually I go for dinner or a movie with my friends. Today however, I had a lot of work to do and didn't get it all done in time for dinner or a movie so I decided to go out with my friend to Second cup. On my way there, I told myself I was going to have herbal tea... but I walked in, looked up at the menu and decided on a medium vanilla bean latte AND chocolate brownie cheesecake - Yikes.

I got home at 11, took a nice long shower and got into bed... 11:30 I was still not asleep, I started thinking of all the things I didn't get done, things I have to do tomorrow and became even more awake. 12am - I'm still awake so I decide to read a book to calm myself and try to fall asleep - I couldn't concentrate on the book because my mind kept going over the things that didn't get done and tomorrow is Friday, so if I want to be able to have a calm weekend with Denys and Katelyn I have to do it ALL tomorrow. I know I will not be able to do it all on Friday (which is actually today - now), so I decided to do some a few things - since I'm awake anyways... so I managed to get most of things that don't require making too much noise done (because the last thing I want to do is wake up Katelyn)

Hopefully now I will be able to go upstairs and get some sleep - and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Katelyn won't wake up until atleast 7am.

The moral to the story - don't drink coffee at in the evening...

Why is it that when I'm really, really tired and had an exhausting day that I can't fall asleep?

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Important items for Camping with a baby

There are certain things that are a must when taking a baby camping,

1. First aid kit - even if you think you won't need it, you should bring it with you. Why? Well, if for some reason you think the baby feels warm, you want to be able to check the temperature and go back to enjoying yourself instead of wondering if it is a fever and worry or end your trip unnecessarily only to get home and find out it was nothing.

2. Extra food - seriously, you may think your baby doesn't eat that much so you should bring the the same amount that she would eat at home - Bring more... because you do not want a hungry baby and no food around (especially if your baby is not yet eating table food)

3. Infant Carrier - if you have an infant carrier take it with you, if you don't have one invest in one. You will want to walk around and enjoy the scenery and it will be much easier for you to do so with a carrier - it will also come in handy if you want to do a hiking trip but your baby is tired. This way they can sleep easily snuggled to you.

4. Very warm clothes - Even if it's summer, remember to bring atleast one item that is very warm for your baby, you never know how cool it will get when the sun goes down, so it's better to be prepared.

5. If you are camping in "bear country" make sure to have bear pepper spray or a long arm axe, and a whistle.

I know it may seem like a lot of things to bring for two or three night trip, but it will ease your mind and you can fully enjoy your trip. When it comes to a baby, it is always better to bring too much, than too little.

We have camped with Katelyn many times and I'm always glad that I have these items handy.

If you think of anything else that is a must for camping with a baby, I would love to hear about it.

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who is this sweet little baby looking up at me?

In the first few months of being a parent, I had many different outlooks on the experience.

I was happy, to have her in my life, happy to be able to touch and kiss and hug the little miracle that I was carrying around for the last nine months.

I was sad that I was saying goodbye to my old life and I grieved the loss of the close one on one relationship that I had with my husband

I was scared that I had this huge responsibility of taking care of a human being for the rest of my life

I was confused about decisions such as to vaccinate, use cloth diapers, use organic products, use glass bottles... so many decisions and each one seemed so important.

But most of the time, I would just wonder who is the sweet little baby and how can I make her as happy as possible while still keeping my own sense of self and still maintaining the relationship with my husband.

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Where oh Where did the time go?

The year went by much faster than I could ever have imagined… One minute I’m setting up a blog and planning to write posts on a weekly basis… yeah right. It’s been 13 months and I’m just NOW getting myself and my life back into something resembling order. I won’t even presume to believe that I’ve got things under control again – no there is a new boss in our house and her name is Katelyn… J
So what I have been doing in the past year? Trying not to go crazy – seriously, between teething, night waking, growth spurt, teething, separation anxiety, and did I mention teething… I can’t believe they will actually fall out and I will have to go through the process again when she’s older.
Seriously, though the year has been great – full of challenges, but I guess that is what life with a baby is all about. And now matter how much you want to divorce your husband, kick him out and change the locks… don’t! It will get better, stress, sleep deprivation and the awesome responsibility of a baby will change your perception, you will become more sensitive, more moody, more clingy and dependent. I know I went through it and 100% of the moms I talk to say the same thing. Dads/boyfriends/husbands just don’t know how to deal with the emotional mess that we become so they tone us out, they become moody themselves and the fight begins about who has changed more… do yourself a favour learn to ignore them for now… in about nine months, you will either become your old self again, or your hubby will be on board, either way, the situation will resolve itself… I wish I had figured that out earlier for myself.
I’ve managed to write the a bit about each month in detail from email I sent to friends, notes I left myself and a bit of what I remember so the year in detail follows.

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